i admit it.
i do.
i did it.
i do.
i did it.
don't ask me why.
and DON'T judge me.
just DO NOT go there, OK?
just don't.
and DON'T judge me.
just DO NOT go there, OK?
just don't.
so ...?
why?
i am sure
you are asking
that very question,
aren't you? well,
don't ask.
coz ....
i dunno.
yup -
that's right ...
i dunno
why.
i just snorted.
and snorted.
and snorted.
and snorted some more.
... and my nose ....
it hurt
it burned,
felt raw,
dried out
dessicated -
that's what it felt like.
my nose is still recovering.
at times i get the insatiable urge
to just peel open my left nare
and scratch away at the its lining
I-T-C-H-Y
as in tissue-that's-healing-itchy
urgh.
it takes 24 to 48 hours
for the nasal congestion
to clear, after snorting
even just one rale of cocaine.
that's nasal congestion,
as in mouth-breathing-
i-cannot-breath-thru-my-nose-congestion.
urgh.
i cannot focus on cocaine
it makes my neurons fire too quickly
to cognate in any really serious way -
as in, i cannot learn when buzzed
on the blow
my brain - its naturally hyper
i guess
i like the feeling i get when
the cocaine slides down my
esophagus, toward my stomach
and the constrictive feeling
my stomach gets as soon as
the cocaine touches it -
like - the feeling of my stomach
contracting
its a wierd rush i like.
of course - you don't eat
when you're buzzing on cocaine
and you don't sleep
you just ....
pee a lot
drink a lot (man, it makes you thirsty)
and sniffle a whole bunch
well. that's my story.
i snorted cocaine
again.
i could not resist
the urge to try it
once more
just ... could not.
don't judge me.
don't lecture me.
just ... don't.
call me a
functioning junkie
if you wanna,
just don't judge me for it.
ADO(RED)
programming studies going well
now its getting into the real
guts of it all -
programming language
i still awake every morning
go to school
learn
and work work work
every evening/night i can
counted at the Gap last night
urgh - baby Gap,
just how many baby socks
can one count?
too many,
is the answer.
blogging here @ blogger
does not really seem that important
anymore
it seems so banal and trivial
the people here seem so small
cardboard and unreal as one can get.
why?
i am sure
you are asking
that very question,
aren't you? well,
don't ask.
coz ....
i dunno.
yup -
that's right ...
i dunno
why.
i just snorted.
and snorted.
and snorted.
and snorted some more.
... and my nose ....
it hurt
it burned,
felt raw,
dried out
dessicated -
that's what it felt like.
my nose is still recovering.
at times i get the insatiable urge
to just peel open my left nare
and scratch away at the its lining
I-T-C-H-Y
as in tissue-that's-healing-itchy
urgh.
it takes 24 to 48 hours
for the nasal congestion
to clear, after snorting
even just one rale of cocaine.
that's nasal congestion,
as in mouth-breathing-
i-cannot-breath-thru-my-nose-congestion.
urgh.
i cannot focus on cocaine
it makes my neurons fire too quickly
to cognate in any really serious way -
as in, i cannot learn when buzzed
on the blow
my brain - its naturally hyper
i guess
i like the feeling i get when
the cocaine slides down my
esophagus, toward my stomach
and the constrictive feeling
my stomach gets as soon as
the cocaine touches it -
like - the feeling of my stomach
contracting
its a wierd rush i like.
of course - you don't eat
when you're buzzing on cocaine
and you don't sleep
you just ....
pee a lot
drink a lot (man, it makes you thirsty)
and sniffle a whole bunch
well. that's my story.
i snorted cocaine
again.
i could not resist
the urge to try it
once more
just ... could not.
don't judge me.
don't lecture me.
just ... don't.
call me a
functioning junkie
if you wanna,
just don't judge me for it.
ADO(RED)
programming studies going well
now its getting into the real
guts of it all -
programming language
i still awake every morning
go to school
learn
and work work work
every evening/night i can
counted at the Gap last night
urgh - baby Gap,
just how many baby socks
can one count?
too many,
is the answer.
blogging here @ blogger
does not really seem that important
anymore
it seems so banal and trivial
the people here seem so small
cardboard and unreal as one can get.
This means challenging my self to compassionate, encouraging, genuine and hostile-free exchanges. It also means contemplating my reaction to the thoughts, feelings and expressions of others, prior to acting upon them. 
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