random thoughts from nowhere

originally uploaded by violin soldier

i think the picture says it all. while our politicians and the most intolerant of our human groups decide to kill anything or anyone that represents a contrasting view, hopefully some of us out here, in the world at large, can realize that love, not hatred, holds the key.

originally uploaded by pink sherbet

now, that looks like a puurrrrfect dress to wear, for climbing, don't it?

originally uploaded by pink sherbet

this picture summarizes, quite nicely, the year i've had. pink monsters, radical changes, and many colourful challenges pouring down on me, deluging me at times.


in other thoughts ...

i hate santa - i really think he and satan are close associates and i can hardly wait for this christmas bullshit to end so i can go on with my life, which basically this bullshit holiday has left in suspended animation.

its dark in here ... no light comes in here and no life lives here. its a place where a living soul waits for death. i hate it here for that reason. since when does a terminal illness give one the right to just withdraw from life ... stop living? and since when does it entitle one to be pampered and served - to a most ridiculous degree - by others, at the expense of said others? i could care less of you're life expectancy, i still expect you to treat me and those around me with respect and grace.

i'm sick. my spirit just feels so worn and lonely that its making my body feel sick. its been several days since i could actually digest any food i ingest. its dark and lonely here. i must get out. i miss my husband. and this just makes me sick inside, too.

i'm thinking of someone ... a doctor, who lives in calcutta. who translates bengali poetry in his spare time. who can think with his cerebral cortex, and not his genitalia. who understands the soul suffering involved in being a healthcare professional.

i feel diminished. and tired to my very core. my brother's a self-centred egocentric prick who's also a taker ... and i continue to serve him. i don't know why. i have to get out. of here.